ruining all your fun? Do you yearn to party with strippers all night, grope strangers in pools, and jet off to Las Vegas on a whim, but your kids are holding you back? Can't find enough parked cars to ram your Mercedes into? Not sure which side of the road to drive? Do you find child-safety seats a big hassle? Then you need Britney Spears' comprehensive and educational new book, "Britney's Drivin' Manual and Parentin' Tips." You'll learn to balance the demands of parenthood while actively pursuing the 24/7 party lifestyle of a fallen pop star. Britney's tips are so easy, anyone can do it! Here's a sample excerpt:
"Sometimes it's so hard to party with yer friends when the babies won't stop cryin'. To keep them lil' critters quiet, I just pour sodey pop in their bottles and they hush right up. If y'all is concerned about what the sugar will do to their teeth, don't worry, you can just take 'em to the dentist to git their teeth whitened. Oh, and you will not believe this y'all, but I done learned that if ya feed yer youngins a big bowl of ice cream before bed, the cold will make 'em sleepy. That's right y'all, I know the secrets pediatricians won't tell you."Medium: ink on paper, digital color, pixie dust. Thanks Neal for the inspiration.