Gallery of the Absurd

Guest Artist: Charles Frazier Draws Kim Kardashian

Today's guest artist is a comic book illustrator who recently launched a new blog featuring some of his celebrity-inspired caricatures. Kim Kardashian ought to seriously consider the tricks profit she could turn if she started renting her butt out to advertisers. She's always thrusting that perky caboose toward the camera or squating on sidewalks and poking it out at the paparazzi, so why not make a buck or two off it? Several advertising industry concepts may be applied here:

Advertising Page Exposure - a measure of the opportunity for readers to see a particular print advertisement, whether or not they actually look at the ad.
Billboard - An outdoor sign or poster.
Eye Tracking - A research method that determines what part of an advertisement consumers look at by tracking the pattern of their eye movements.
Frequency - The number of times an average person or household is exposed to a media vehicle within a given time frame.
Reach - The estimated number of individuals in the audience of broadcast that is reached at least once during a specific period of time.

Other advertising terms that come to mind are Spread, End-user, Horizontal Discount, Insertion, Puffery and Teaser Campaign. Kim Kardashian's arse is an advertiser's bonanza!

Exquisite Corpse: Pamela Anderson

The collaborative game of Exquisite Corpse was invented by the Surrealists in 1925. In this email version of the game, three participants agree upon a subject to be illustrated. In this case, we chose the lovely Pamela Anderson as our inspiration. Next, each participant is assigned either the head, torso or legs and is given a 1/3 of a page to complete their drawing. None of the artists have any idea what the others are drawing - and this is where the fun comes in. Hiltron of Planet Hiltron was assigned Pammy's head and when he finished his creation, he sent only a glimpse of her neck to Gilmore over at Pretty On The Outside. Once Gilmore finished having his way with Anderson's torso, he sent the tiniest sliver of his drawing over to me so I could get busy on her lower half. The Exquisite Corpse experiment is said to tap into the collective unconsciousness of the participants, and, well, it appears we all tapped into variations of Pamela's fleshy protuberances.

Guest Artist: Rod Filbrandt

Rod Filbrandt, one of my favorite artists, has realistically captured the reality of reality TV. Sure, there are a few mildly entertaining reality shows on the tube. Take Wife Swap for example. An episode description grabbed from their website reads A primped-and-proper mother who runs a high-end salon for little girls swaps families with a hardworking mother who bottles and sells deer urine with her husband. Set the Tivo! Next episode: A jar of pickles is placed upon a crate of kazoos from China, you won't believe what happens next.

Guest Artist: Erick Moore

Erick Moore's recent series of paintings showcase images inspired by Hollywood's quest for perfection. He's especially captivated with the plastic, sugar-coated, drug-induced euphoria that is mistaken for reality in Hollywood. This portrait of Lindsay Lohan is titled Dare to Love Her! and features swirling mounds of coke ice cream, gum drops and cupcakes. Erick's work was included in the WOW Report's recent art show, Just Britney. You may view more of his celeb-inspired work here.

Guest Artist: Hiltron

Have you ever wondered what certain overexposed celebrities might look like when they grow old, become fat, or switched genders? The mysterious artist who calls themself Hiltron wondered and with some of the most expert Photoshop skills I've ever seen, created hundreds of images that are sure to delight you. Planet Hiltron is destined to become your newest bookmark and is guaranteed to give you lots of laughs. On a different note, I've been in Los Angeles for the past week and was too busy being stuck in hot dusty traffic and business meetings to get any work done for Gallery of the Absurd. I'm back home now and just dipped my brush in ink to work on my latest painting. Ahhhhhh, sweet relief.

Trump and Rosie's Mud Wrasslin'

Miss 14 is on vacation and has called upon her talented art buddies Tom Bagley and Kipling West to help fill in the gaps so she can continue to indulge in wanton hedonism while blissfully ignoring anything and everything having to do with celebrity gossip. Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell are having a childish mudslinging contest over in their corner of the elementary school yard, bringing in friends like Larry King and Barbara Walters as witnesses. The dead-eyed O'Donnell accused Trump of moral and literal bankruptcy and the short fingered vulgarian responded, predictably, with fat and lesbian comments. What neither of these unpleasant, overbearing children understand is that no one looks good in a mud battle...although they both win in the publicity stakes. Stay tuned for a tearful "forgiveness" scene between these bloated egos when the "feud" stops getting press. Guest writer: Kipling West. Guest artist: Tom Bagley.

Bai Ling's Fashion Show

(click to enlarge)

Guest artist Charles Frazier created this illustration of Bai Ling's many interesting outfits. I like how Bai Ling always seems to create an outfit out of bits of old tire, string and duct tape. Charles is a celebrity cartoonist and has been published in all sorts of magazines, but he doesn't yet have a website.  All that is changing and we'll let you know as soon as he launches "Startoonz", his showcase of celebrity and pop culture cartoons.

Paris Hilton Strikes a Pose

A few weeks ago, I asked my friend (and one of my favorite artists) Robert Hardgrave to be a guest artist on Gallery of the Absurd.  He's not obsessed or corrupted with celebrity gossip like the rest of us, so he had no idea what to do. Robert innocently said "I guess I'll have to go buy a tabloid so I can see what's going on out there".  !!!!! Oh, how I wish I was still as innocent as he!!!  He's one of those people who when you ask him about Kevin Federline, he says "who's that?"  That is why I love Robert. Here is his version of Paris Hilton.... I think he captured her beautifully.

I'll be back with regular postings starting in April.  I'm working on a super secret celeb project with a HOT gossip blogger right now. Soon, very soon we'll unveil our madness.

Celebrity Valentines: Ernest Borgnine

Gallery of the Absurd is pleased to introduce our first guest artist, Rod Filbrandt. Rod and I share an appreciation of Ernest Borgnine, but only Rod would think to portray Borgnine as Cupid. Old Ernest has appeared in over 100 films, but my favorite was the classic 70's disaster movie The Poseidon Adventure. Watch Ernest Borgnine bark out orders on a sinking ship while angry and wet....swoon, oh how I LOVE Ernest Borgnine.  See more of Rod Filbrandt's work at Chowderhead Bazoo.