Look, I realize this is pandering to the lowest common denominator of cesspool gossip, but my mission is to illustrate gossip...and so I do what I must. My inspiration comes from the fact Britney Spears and Cheetos have become so synonymous that one term is rarely mentioned without the other. Just take a look at what the bloggers are saying. In addition, Star magazine has been monitoring Brit's weight gain over the past month and even ran a cover photo screaming "Brit Gains 20 lbs. MORE!"
Our investigative team has just uncovered Frito-Lay's plans to expand their product line by offering Cheetos Britney, an even cheesier, greasier and more unnatural shade of orange crunchy snack. We were able to obtain a prototype image of the bag (see above) and also got our hands on the teaser ad (see below) scheduled to appear in upcoming magazines right before the product becomes available.
This is what the ad will look like inserted into the pages of a sample magazine.
Medium: Ink and digital color.
haha! Thats hilarious.. that poor little (or shall i say big?) hog!
Posted by: | October 03, 2006 at 02:37 PM
I DO NOT KNOW WHAT PEOPLE HAVE AGAINST BRITNEY, SHE IS SIMPLY A POP STAR AND WHAT IF SHE WANTED A BREAK FOR HER OWN LIFE, ITS NOT LIKE SHE IS NEVER COMING BACK AS A POP STAR , SHE JUST TOOK A BREAK TO HAVE HER KIDS..... ITS HER LIFE, AND IF SHE HAS DONE THINGS THAT RUIN HER REPUTATION , SO WHAT ??? ITS HER PROBLEM..RESPECT HER PRIVATE LIFE, BEING A POP STAR ISNT ALL , SHE IS A WOMAN , THE GOAL OF A WOMAN IS TO HAVE KIDS.....AND NOW THAT SHE HAD ONE AND IS HAVING MORE THERE IS NOTHING TO DO ITS NOT LIKE SHE IS KILLING THE BABY FOR HER CAREER OR MAYBE ADOPTING THEM, BEING AGAINST HER FOR HER FERTILITY IS A WASTE OF TIME, AND THERE IS 1 MILLION PEOPLE IN EACH COUNTRY WHO WOULD DO ANYTHING TO HAVE KIDS, BUT THEY CANT SO LET BRITNEY HAVE A BREAK AND BE FREE LET HER HAVE AS MANY KIDS AS SHE WANTS , I WILL ASURE YOU SHE WILL COME BACK AS THE SPECIAL POP STAR WE KNOW SHE WAS.
Posted by: ashley | September 10, 2006 at 04:54 PM
oh!! yes we love this picture!!!!!
Posted by: petit couillu | August 24, 2006 at 03:13 AM
Can I just say one thing? Britney has worked very hard in the past years with her career and keeping herself looking good. I bet all you who have wrote means things about her arn't HALF as pretty as she is or as talented. Ok so her singing voice isnt the best in the world, but its okay and shes a great dancer, and not to bad of an actress. Okay so shes let herself go a bit and is married to a complete asshole, but shes got a baby to look after and another on the way!! Shes entitled to gain a bit of weight and chill out through all this, you shallow f***in bastards! Shes still human! You people make me sick. I bet most guys would rather pay to f*** Britney as she is now than get paid to f*** your mom when she was pregnant with you! Get a life, your all jealous of her as she is a very pretty and talented girl with more money than you'll ever have and she'l bounce back looking better than ever in the end, just you wait.
Posted by: chloe | August 05, 2006 at 04:34 PM
Jeez! Thanks for reminding me how disgusting cheetos are.
Then again I think the only punishment hard enough for Kev would be if thick hairy siders popped out from her zits every time she talks and ate him slowly and painfully.
Posted by: Dou | July 11, 2006 at 06:25 AM
With her makeup she may appear to be pretty but her husband sure ain't no matter what light you put on him. With he being married to a man like that I don't see how anyone COULD be jealous of her.
Posted by: Long Island Irish | April 07, 2006 at 07:50 PM
I think Britney Spears is really pretty You people are just Jeolouse of.
Posted by: sarah Hawatmeh | March 29, 2006 at 01:28 PM
Holy shmoley 14, I reckon I almost pooped my pants in horrified glee when I saw that closeup. Ewww! YesSS! Sick!
Posted by: Kamala | March 09, 2006 at 12:24 AM
^this^
Posted by: Darth munki | February 26, 2006 at 05:01 AM
OMG utterly hilarious one of a kind u rock! :P
Posted by: Lauren | February 18, 2006 at 07:20 PM
This is horrible but I <3 it.
Posted by: Jenny | February 16, 2006 at 05:19 PM
Okay I have to admit the picture captures Brittney in all her glory.It is fabulous !After seeing her driving with her baby on her lap ,I am down with all the criticisim of her .she is not only a porker she is a bad mommy. she needs to drop the cheetoes and put her kid in a friggin car seat.Shit happens Brit ,,wise up !
Posted by: karen | February 12, 2006 at 05:02 PM
So britney's become synonymous with cheetos. Is that because of you 14? You're hilarious. I cam acrosss this blog ( http://www.bastardly.com/archives/category/sex-celebrities/britney-spears/ ) after clicking your google search, maybe you've seen it, probably. It has some good stuff also. I especially like the K-Fed rap album cover. Pure genius.
Posted by: Goober | February 11, 2006 at 08:30 PM
eew, i seriously almost vomitted the first time i saw the close up of her month.. naassty
Posted by: mary | February 08, 2006 at 02:11 PM
A brilliant concept and masterful execution!
Posted by: cibbuano | February 07, 2006 at 07:05 PM
I love your site.. you are a brilliant artist. Your renee zellwegger stuff is my fave.. Please do some posh stuff.. she my fave celeb to knock!!!
Posted by: nadine | February 06, 2006 at 08:56 AM
ha! those whiteheads look TOO real!!
Posted by: Dawn (webmiztris) | February 05, 2006 at 11:36 AM
brittney is a little nasty skank.
Posted by: lebrandyn | February 04, 2006 at 05:04 PM
Fuck!!!That close up was great!!!!!
Posted by: | February 03, 2006 at 12:07 PM
Yes, yes, yes...the zits, the cheeto residue, the thick neck are all fine, but my favorite touch were the long dangly earrings. One could almost touch those plastic flea market beads.
For all the people who wag fingers and state, "gossip is mean spirited" or "Brit is losing the weight" I believe you are missing the larger picture. Celebrities are safe topics for the masses to discuss. It makes little difference if one is liberal or conservative, old or young, poor or rich - we all know who she is and in some small way have an opinion about her, which may be shared at the water cooler without much passion. Further, in a gestalt inspired world, we without fame can look at postpartum Britney and perhaps see aspects of ourselves (albeit without the pee colored earrings).
Fame is a difficult mistress to pursue...one shouldn't do it if one isn't willing to pay the price.
Posted by: [email protected] | February 03, 2006 at 09:33 AM
eeeeeeww! The close-up is very well-done, but gross nonetheless! And very Britney now!
Posted by: cherise | February 03, 2006 at 05:47 AM
14, I'll still enjoy your work when you're painting butterflies. And while I'm waiting, I'll enjoy another helping of your crunchy, cheesegasmic celebrity gossip brought to life! Britney has her guilty pleasures, and I have mine!
Posted by: greencellist | February 03, 2006 at 12:27 AM
I THINK EVERYONE SHOULD JUST LEAVE HER ALONE SHE IS HAVING TO DEAL WITH MUCH KAOS...FROM THE BABY WEIGHT TO KEVINS BEHAVIOR.
Posted by: RAUL CASTILLO | February 02, 2006 at 11:29 AM
that was very bad of you guys to do that too any body,its not fair,she just had a baby,and i think you should give her some time too come back too her self.
Posted by: Alex | February 02, 2006 at 09:08 AM
14, I do think a trailer in the background of the illustration might be appropos.
Poor girl. I do feel kinda sorry for her.
Posted by: Moonmaid | February 02, 2006 at 08:13 AM
TOP over TOP !!!!
MAGNIFIQUE ! Lol !
Hi hi hi hi.....
BRAVOSSIMO !
Posted by: TONTON RAVACHOL | February 02, 2006 at 01:30 AM
Great job! :)
Posted by: Ivan Minic | February 02, 2006 at 12:26 AM
"Thick, linebacker neck..." Hah! YES!!
"Jabba the Brit" Double Ha-HAH!! and double-yes!
Truer words, never spoke.
Posted by: Viper Tetsu | February 01, 2006 at 09:57 PM
Dear Halden and other Britney fans,
I appreciate your concern for Britney Spears. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone was as compassionate as you? I hear ya, I really do. Since I have decided to devote a small part of my art career documenting and observing celebrity gossip, that's what is going to show up on Gallery of the Absurd. My mission is to paint gossip, pure and simple. I take inspiration from the printed tabloids as well as from the many gossip bloggers out there. I have yet to find any sweet and gentle gossip regarding Britney's low self-esteem or whether she feels bad about her pimples - if it was there, I'd illustrate it.
Gossip isn't pretty, but it's not going to go away any time soon. The Britney Spears human being is not the same character as what the gossip makes her out to be. Gossip turns a celebrity into a completely different creature. A curious creature in a freak show...and this is what interests me.. For now, I'm going to continue taking from material that already exists (ex: the meme of Britney and Cheetos) and documenting it with my illustrations. I'm not going to be painting gossip forever, mostly because it's so draining. Perhaps you'll become a fan of my work when I start painting butterflies. I'm not kidding. I WILL paint butterflies one day.
Start a gossip blog that speaks nothing but positive and uplifting reports about tabloid celebrites. I don't think anyone has done that yet.
love,
14
Posted by: 14 | February 01, 2006 at 06:03 PM
Don't you think she looks in the mirror too and has low self confidence. Don't you think she has been unhappy with her weight. Don't you think she sees her pimples and wishes they were gone. People who take glee out of other poeple's misery are just mean and spiteful. On top of that I saw pictures of her at the SAG awards this year ,06', she has dropped all that weight she gained. I mean she is not as thin as she used to be, lets say Slave 4 U, but she does not have a double chin and her skin looked very clear. Plus, all those Cheetos that she apparntly eats day in and day out those where just snap shots of days that those photographers caught her eating them. It certaintly does not mean everyday.
Posted by: Halden | February 01, 2006 at 04:53 PM
you rock 14 ! We D- listers love you ! once again you managed to capture exactly what we all think!
Posted by: KatieScarlett | February 01, 2006 at 04:37 PM
She's been eating her Cruci-fixin's:
http://www.cnn.com/2006/SHOWBIZ/TV/02/01/people.spears.ap/index.html
Posted by: Patrick Fitzgerald | February 01, 2006 at 02:48 PM
This is way to close to reality. She's gone from the Rolling Stone jail-bait covergirl to Roseanne Barr in 2 short years.
Posted by: coglethorpe | February 01, 2006 at 12:47 PM
I'd still do her.
Posted by: Bill M | February 01, 2006 at 12:23 PM
remarkable resembalance to the porker her self! damn to be 25 rich and look like that... what a shame
Posted by: carmen | February 01, 2006 at 11:36 AM
this is so funny
Posted by: carmen | February 01, 2006 at 11:31 AM
LOSERS!!! She's already losing weight - haven't you seen photos from last week...stay up on your gossip, if you're gonna comment. You're probably all eating Cheetos right now...
Posted by: Paco | February 01, 2006 at 10:37 AM
This is priceless!! I love anything slamming this pig. She is such a slob and that womanizing mess of a husband should both be beaten with large objects. This porker only got married to say "I'm married now it's legal to have a baby with the sperm donor she picked."
Posted by: NoHerFan | February 01, 2006 at 10:13 AM
Simply and beautifully grotesque. I can envision the acne pustules in exquisite detail and smell the skank Cheeto breath through my screen. My stomach is actually burning and churning at these images. Cheesegasmic indeed.
Posted by: Ilsa | February 01, 2006 at 09:53 AM
hater
Posted by: | February 01, 2006 at 09:48 AM
This is priceless!! Anything I find slamming her is great. She has been a pig since she came on the scene and now she married a womanizing slob only to get pregnant (to have a sperm donor)This just shows even more what an f*$king porker she is and has all the potential to be, Kudos!!
Posted by: NotHerFan | February 01, 2006 at 09:42 AM
You know, watching her video for "Oops, I did it again" and seeing her now is an amazing transformation from pop-tart to Jabba the Brit.
Sad but oh well. Cheetos are like cheese crack though so I feel her addiction.
Posted by: Johnny Huh? | February 01, 2006 at 09:22 AM
Give Britney a break! She is not all that bad. Granted she has lost some of her star looks, Britney will rise above!
Posted by: 4brit | February 01, 2006 at 08:29 AM
14, I am yet again speechless at the astounding quality of your work; your new metaphor is that of Beluga caviar in a sea of Aldi-brand tuna!! (which I'm sure the lovely Miss Britney Jean Cletus purchases on a regular basis) Keep the celebrity disses coming!!
Posted by: Kristin | February 01, 2006 at 07:42 AM
Looks like she could also double as the endorser for Valtrex
Posted by: | February 01, 2006 at 07:03 AM
You imply that regular Cheetos are an unnatural shade of orange. I take offense. I believe that everything else that is supposedly orange are just poor imitaors, cheesy imitators, if you will. I believe the Cheetos orange is what God intended orange to be.
Posted by: nvr4money | February 01, 2006 at 06:51 AM
ur site is hilarious! ur a very talented and twisted artist :) that's a compliment by the way
Posted by: gnarlykitty | February 01, 2006 at 06:10 AM
LMAO nice!
Posted by: Fug | February 01, 2006 at 01:49 AM
The sad thing is this is true. Britney has allowed herself to go down the sewer this year. I only feel sorry for that poor child; soon his folks will have no money left and he will be forced to wear a Cheeto's bag around the trailer park.
Posted by: Long Island Irish | January 31, 2006 at 04:24 PM
Ahhh I love it when you take on Britney, those Cheetos will get you everytime. I guess Kevin has to kiss this pimple ridden lips to get his allowance, heh now thats justice.
Posted by: Damien Morgan | January 31, 2006 at 03:00 PM