Gallery of the Absurd

More Jeff Polage Nonsense/Genius

Pete Doherty...Kiss Me Baby, I'm a Rock Star.


Mouth Opens Wide Enough for Brain to Fall Out: Jessica Simpson

Back By Popular Demand:Jeff Polage

Okay, okay, you can stop sending me requests for more Jeff....here he is!  We've got all sorts of Jeff Polage images for you this week, so check back daily. All celeb images scanned out of the always entertaining Star magazine.

Madonna Looking Like a Sour Rabbit

George Clooney Rolling His Eyes After Yet Another Girlfriend Asks Why He Won't Marry Her

Valentine, You're My Missing Link

Genetic comparisons claim 96% similarity between chimps and humans.

• Valentines from the 40's and 50's were corny, creepy, and puzzling.
• The Olsen Twins.

Throw the top three statements into a blender, pour into the brain of a sleep-deprived artist, and within 30 minutes out comes this Valentine. Medium: gouache on paper. SOLD

Celebrity Valentines: Self-Absorbed Hotel Heiress

If you've got no one to LOVE on Valentine's Day, no worries. You can be like Paris Hilton and LOVE yourself. Anyone that doesn't agree with your inflated assessment of your astounding beauty, talent and accomplishment is just jealous. You are the American dream, the perfect blonde Barbie doll, and everyone wishes they were just like you. Medium: gouache and acrylic on paper.  SOLD

Celebrity Valentines: Love Comes in Many Forms

Although Tara Reid seems to have recently cleaned up her act, she still comes to mind whenever someone mentions the term "party girl". Hundreds of photos documenting Tara's boozy party antics exist on the Internet, and what strikes me is how she always looks so happy as she clings her cocktail close to her heart. This Tara Reid Valentine embodies the giddiness and rapid heartbeat we experience when we realize we have fallen hopelessly in LOVE. Medium: gouache and acrylic on paper.

Celebrity Valentines: Sign on the Dotted Line

Nothing says LOVE like signing a $5 million contract agreement to pose as a loving companion to a tiny man with a very large ego.  This nasty little rumor was reported on Page Six and in the New York Daily News, but of course we know it can't be true. Obviously Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are madly in love and shove show their affection and devotion to each other every time they make a public appearance. When I think of LOVE, the first romantic vision that flutters into my head is Tom and Katie with their gushing big grins and persistant public declarations of love. Sigh. Medium: Ink, acrylic on paper, digital hoo ha.