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Von Furstinburs Shclockilschwats

I will NEVER forget the first time I lay eyes on the glorious god given talent that is Thomas Kinkade! I swear (and I don't do that lightly my dears!) that I - yeah- verily 'tis true- I did shit Norman Rockwell out my newly Thomas Kinkade opened bung! The light! The cottage! The little blobs of paint- that make it ALMOST look like an actual painting- so meticulously placed by little children in hairnets in Hong Kong!!! That I a mere MORTAL be blessed with this $395.00 "limited" edition (2,950 some odd "prints) MASTERPIECE was beyond staggering! Dear heavens above!!! Take me NOW but please PLEASE leave my Thomas Kinkade "limited edition "Painting" behind plexiglass for my heirs!!!!! I am truly not worthy to behold- let alone OWN such a masterpiece! Piccasso can only DREAM of such art, such GLORY that is Dear Thom! It ALMOST makes me want to move to Branson, MO or Lee's Summit, MO or Beeville, TX just to besurrounded by my fellow THOMAS KINKADE Affixiandos!!!
Yours in Christ, Burn in Hell Kiss Kiss!!!
A TRUE art Admirer!!!


" you find them only with the very rich who can afford to buy them."

You must be kidding me, LOL! Mark my a few short years, this dreck will be impossible to sell at flea markets for cents on the dollar. It's pure unadulterated crap, and I warned people when it first came out--don't waste your money on TK with so much honest art out there.


What a joke his art is. a bad joke & a worse lie. STILL he is as bad as basquiat.

collectables knives

I've never understood the hoopla about his paintings. My son has bought several, but I've seen other works that are better - at far lesser prices than his. This is absolutely just another case of great marketing and mass production. I'll stick to my one-of-a-kind knife collection and first day covers


are you kidding me, loosen up the man is a joke. he makes glade candles for christ's sake.


Thomas Kinkade is a great painter, he found a good way to market his works, I bought a few of his paintings, it was not hard to do, they are really a fantastic piece of art, so stop the insults on this great artist, his works will still be here when you are long gone, maybe some of you can tell us who you think parallels this great Artist, Thomas Kinkade.


After reading a lot of remarks made againt Thomas Kinkade I find it laughable, maybe some of these uneducated people should visit there local Art Center, Thomas Kinkade is a fine artist and his work is highly desired, so get a life, or maybe you just can not afford to purchase his works, hey! most artists of the past never made a dime on their works, today you find them only with the very rich who can afford to buy them.


I have two of these paintings and I wanted to have the gallery sell them for me they were supposed to be sold out items.they wouldnt even talk to me there basically worthless but they sell them as investments what a crock of shit


SNARF!!!! The Ladies who Love Light Lunches will be all atwitter with this one--priceless!


While he does paint his own paintings, and they are peaceful in a way, I have to say that TK is not a nice man to work with. I worked for the engineering firm that handled the driveway remodel and the retaining walls needed to support it and he was rude, inconsiderate, refused to come in and talk to us about the project (he sent in his "people" to talk about it) and then called (or had his "people" call) to complain that it wasn't done soon enough. It's not like we didn't have other clients we started working with before him, who got to have their projects finished before his (It's not like we were going to drop everything until we'd finished his monster driveway for his HUGE home in Monte Sereno)
Also, the "mountain" looks a bit like he ripped-off James Christensen's style.


The Disney versions of Winnie the Pooh are a vile perversion of Ernest Shepherd's original drawings for Milne and not permitted in our home. They deserved to be pissed on.

Now the Painter of Blight has found his true calling--spreading his hallowed DNA in every kitchy hollow. He should drink the Kink-aid.

Are Kinkaid's "paintings" hung in the massa's quarters of the Whitefolksonly House?


Hi! Met you this evening at Brian's b-day party. Anyway, your site has given me great entertainment during this night shift.

I'm so glad someone other than me has made fun of Thomas Kink-Aid. Painter of light, my ass.


he doesn't paint the stuff does he? he hires artists to do the paintings. correct me if i'm wrong.


"Painter of Light"- I love it. I think I might start calling myself "The Outreach Worker Of Light" - it has a ring to it.

And now, after I've finished contemplating exactly how challenging it must be to paint light I'm going to daydream of that happy day when I'm rich enough to commission a cuddly bear urinal for my own loo...


Oh my Lord, 14, after reading Lapdawg of Christ's last comment, I REALLY want to see you paint T. Kinkade whizzing on the Bush Twins. Oh my god, please? I would be your personal slave for ever and ever. You have no idea how happy that image would make me.

Demon Kitty

I have to say it again goddamnit, because there is a "Thomas Kinkade gallery about 10 minutes away from where I live. I suppose it caters to those filthy rich West University Houstonians ....

How can this man claim to be better than Picasso when Picasso didn't paint the same shit over and over and over and over and over and over ..... again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love you 14! You are a genius! I love this site; I get to appreciate good art and be as obnoxious and crude and juvenile and as filthy as I was meant to be! Kisses!!!

Demon Kitty

Lapdawg of Christ

Nuh! im not retartid, satan made u say that!!!!!!!
Wini the pew is alriddy yelo so whats the problum?
Thos kinkade dint pee on the Bush twinz eether, its all a lye.


I just love the image of Thomas Kincaide whizzing on cute little animals. I hear he's part of the "Presidential Prayer Circle". You know, the high powered Christian men who pray for George Bush's sucesses. I wonder if he gets to do his territory-marking thing at those meetings?


Oh, 14. I don't think I can tell my mom about this. Oh, what the hell! She loves tabloid gossip! Of course I'm gonna tell her. But she does love his work. Fortunately, I've talked her out of buying his over-priced junk.

Good work! And shame of that b@#%ard for peeing on Pooh.


Um, this scares me more than a little bit...doesn't he put his DNA in every work of "art" he puts out? What dya suppose is gonna go "into" this?

Demon Kitty

I am so fucking pissed, I can't even be half assed articulate.

This motherfucking wet dish rag, sop ass bitch urinated on WINNIE THE POO!!!!! I loved Winnie the Poo! Someone should dress up like Winnie the Poo and beat the shit out of this dick wad! I am appalled.

This man claims to have "the divine right" which enables him to paint his kitsch! That crap reminds me of the fucking Bradford exchange.

Now that I got that off my chest, I have paused to take a look at his paintings. I must say, there is something insane about them. The man has to be a control freak. This sweet, cozy. gemutlichkeit he's created... there is something really oppressive about it and maniacal. His "light" appears to be inspired by those Sunday school pictures of Jesus Christ coming down from Heaven. Ya' know, the way the sun was shining through Jezuz?!

I can imagine him praying over his paintings with his wife Nanette. Then I see him throwing her on the ground and sodomizing her into the hospital.

Demon Kitty


14, as hilariously tasteless as your Pooh Bear Urinal is, it still has miles to go to match the true offensiveness of this Kinkaid item, the Thomas Kinkade Faith Mountain:

How he manages to make Jesus look like he needs Doan's Pills, and Mary look like a club-ho is beyond me!

My 12 year old daughter pointed out, "Look, Jesus is on top, waving!"


Great job as always 14!!

Lapdawg of Christ:

UH...? What?? I hope you're foreign because if not then that just means you're retarded. Now that I think about it, you might be retarded either way.

michael ian bateson

ive been watching your work for a while and loving it (still don't understand the venom behind the clooney pic - i like george clooney and think its a funny picture! i think he would, too!) but i have to THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for doing this one (and the nsfw one). i hate T Kinkade. The man has skill, I'll give him that, but I just can't get behind his vision of life. I'm not saying everything has to be meaningful and edgy but hell, bob ross painted the same things over and over but at least he wasn't an insufferable prick!

thank you for your site and art!

Lapdawg of Christ

Ur jus jellus cuz G-d luvs Thos kinkaid mor thin U. Hee is a grate panter n a gud man. The storry abowt the limo and the hores isn't evin tru.


Any "art" cast in resin is garbage!!! I love Pooh and I love Irony. But for God's sake alone, Thomas Kincaid needs to be erased from or social conscience. I'm far from being religious, but, using God to sell his items and then pissing on a representative of kindness and generosity should tell any moron with money that he absolutely does not deserve that money. Thomas Kincaid is a greedy liar!!


Once an acquaintance came over and complimented the landscapes I'd made. Then I went to her house and saw her Thomas Kinkade paintings , and knew that I sucked. I'll never paint again if someone can like mine and Kinkade's work at the same time. Bah!


Heck the dude is like the franklin mint of art, can't beleive that his cookie box work actually sells big. Kinkade sucks. Poor Winnie.


Thomas Kinkade is a HACK. He has other people churn out these "paintings" and he just slaps his name on them. And people pay good money for this shizz. Meh.

Long Island Irish

LOL he pissed on pooh bear! Oh my God someone MUST write a children's book out of this madness! :D
That is the funniest thing I have ever read! I wonder if Jesus told him to do this! HAHAHA!!!! ROTF!!!


kinkade is no 'painter of light', he's a painter of tchotchkes in redneck's homes... what an egotistical buffoon.


Ughhh. I detest this man's "art" with a passion. This is just the latest in a well publicized series of poor choices this "artist" has made. I hope is audience stops buying his "inspired by God" images after hearing of the multiple recent encounters this idiot has so casually done. I mean who heckles a Seigfried and Roy after one of them has been mauled by a tiger....the same person who whizzes on Winnie thats who. The Painter of trite sucks ass.

Suburbia in the City

His website is as boring as watching old people do calesthetics or someone do needlepoint. As much as I think Winnie the Pooh is annoying, why would be urinate on it? Think of the poor kid who's Winnie it was.


Who takes a piss on a DISNEY character? Southpark needs to follow your lead and make fun of this fool, STAT.

Or did they already?

Love the R-Rated pix!!!


"I don't believe, in time that he (Picasso) will be regarded as the titan he is now."
- T. Kinkade

Hmmm.... Pablo Picasso had more talent, versatility AND taste, for that matter, at age 10. Where is the artistic integrity or dignity of selling mass quantities of crap? What a self-inflated moron Kinkade is; thanks for putting him in your crosshairs, 14, for he surely deserves it, very entertaining!

Viper Tetsu

Um, the latter was a joke, by the way. Given some of the sphincter-clenching responses to your Clooney piece, I felt I should explain.

Jesus Christ Driving a John Deere Whistling Toby Keith Songs, your consistency is staggering! Now all we need is a ceramic sculpture of the artist, scaled so that his head fits perfectly into the Cuddle Bear Urinal. No, scratch that. You'd need to take out a mortgage to afford one of those muthafuckas.

Viper Tetsu

Quit picking on this troubled genius, you jealous harpy. If you could create works as enduring as Kinkade's "Pastel Lighthouse that Looks Like My Little Pony's Binky" or his masterwork, "Pastel Cottage that Looks Like My Little Pony's Gay Cousin's Stable," then maybe you wouldn't be such an embittered husk of a human being...

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