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i want to registered


c'mon everyone, stop pretending that thin girls aren't the HOTTEST girls


I think that she looks like she's been on drugs for the last 10 years of her life. How old is she? Those pictures make her look like at least 50.








isn't it funny how nobody wrote about the Katie Holmes appearance so far?? LOOK AT KATIE HOLMES! It might be the exact image of her current psychological condition! Brainwashed and numb and LAUGHING


Ohh, that cover is a very accurate parody. Ow.

Viper Tetsu

Incidentally, Quatorze, in case you haven't done so already, you should go to this very apropos link:

...And please in the name of all that is (un)holy, give us some scary celeb pumpkins, dude.

Jenn F.

This site is the best. Not only is there consistently hilarious and high-quality art, but the comments, descriptions, and opinions that you guys post just completely crack me up. You really do 14 and her work justice.

But I digress. Nicole must have really been traumatized by spending too much time as the chubby sidekick of the skank. But hey... I'd take a little extra chub over a crab infestation any day.

Demon Kitty

I find it really sad. The ribs, the bones, the sternum, not to mention her baggy bikini make her look like a a person at the end stage of a terminal illness who needs the nurse to refresh their diaper. Someone help this girl.


i'm surprised that Nicole is still alive thesedays ..and karen carpenter dead? Why are all the useless ones still alive?


i simply refuse to believe this thing was running along anywhere. the rocks rolling about in her empty bony skull was probably so mind numbingly loud that is was the rattling and rocks knocking about which drew the attention of the photogs as opposed to her celebrated body image.


I love Nicole. I hear she is getting help with her weight....finally.


14, hasn't Star given you a free subscription yet? How about Weekly World News? With all the pub you're giving them they should at least do that for you.
Oh, and I guess why Tom won't marry Katie is because. . .she's so much more attractive than he is? At least in the above pic. . . She does seem quite a bit more human there than usual. :)


Terror on the Beach might make an excellent B movie. The undead, in the form of emaciated celebrities, come to meance the living. In fact, I think that I smell a possible "Tree House of Horror" Simpsons episode!

Account Deleted

The scariest thing about this picture, apart from the inherent scariness of her entire person, is how accurate it is. The reimagining of Nicole R. as the fly was funny but clearly she's not see through (tho who knows how long that will last.) No, this rendering is terrifying for bringing out what's truly there. So scary.

Viper Tetsu

In addition to sci-fi paperbacks, you're also riffing on EC comics with your illo, and it's like a special gift to us dorks old and/or nerdy enough to get the reference.

As always, the minute details make for the spiciest spices. The address label on The Star, for one, made me pee myself. Literally. Thanks; now I've gotta go change.

Pat Angello

Awesome, again - simply awesome!


hahaha that's classic! licoricepirate, they don't really know how much they weigh, they have an "expert" take an educated guess.

Nicole should cash in on the Halloween festivities and play a mummy in a haunted house. wouldn't it be great if they made her do that on SIMPLE LIFE?? hahahaha and Paris could be some sort of diseased witch, what with that hook nose and wonky eye.


For some reason I read the heading to say, "Attack of the Bones". Y'now, a spoof of Star Wars Attack of the clones?


Gross. Not even a Rob Zombie flick would chop her up.


Yucky that girl is like a sub zero size, poor, poor girl ... hope shes getting real help, you know not 'Paris' help.



She DOES look tragically skinny and grotesque, but you can tell from all the other photos that the one featured on the cover was taken as she was running, hence the loose skin, tits and loose bikini bottom all succumbed to gravity simultaneously - in the other still photos, her belly doesn't look wrinkled at all. I do think it's wicked of them to troll for the worst and then splash that about. On the other hand, if Nicole were a piece of fried chicken, she'd be neck-and-neck with Madonna competing for the last stringy nasty piece left in the bucket - the one no one wanted. Viva fried chicken!


OH sh*t.. that's a very disturbing photograph


She didn't buy a medium bathing suit thats whats so scary... thats probably an XS. She needs to start shopping in the kids section.




how do they know how much stars weigh ?

what, do they hide airport luggage scales under the red carpet or sumfing?

o__O ..

i always wondered this.


The "dumpy diaper" look is hot.

Poor Nicole. I'm sure she bought a small size, but they're still too large.

jenny vorwaller

genius and so much truth to your ironic art, soo true about horrible tabloid photos, but you just can't help but revel in it when the outrageous ones (ahem, TOM) are in your face and drive you batty.


I love how you put "TOM" in rainbow... ha!

I visit your page often and it always makes me laugh. Awesome work, really.


Yuck! She looks like a shriveled mummy they show in museums and oddity shops, and that limp bikini hanging off her butt isn't helping either! Doesn't she know men like women who have a bit of body fat- to give them curves- and also to make them soft and huggable? She doesn't look huggable- she looks a preserved corpse, which is lacking in sex appeal. Good job and emphasizing every wrinkle and jutting bone. I visit this site every day, it's one of my guilty pleasures.


Ha ha. Man, she really does look wicked bad. With that face she's making and the bones protruding through her skin it looks like all she's been sustaining herself with is lemons.

Dawn (webmiztris)

egads, she's gross! if I saw that on the beach, I would definitely run in the opposite direction!


One would guess that a girl of her size would stop buying medium and large sized bathing suits that swim on her skeletal frame and reveal what happens when you live on coffee, nicotine and the occasional leaf of iceberg lettuce.

Secondly you are right when it comes to magazines picking the one picture out of dozens that would make her look the worst.

Sucks to be famous...but then there is all that money...sigh.

Funny shit 14!

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