The Anna Nicole Smith Media Circus: Prince Von Anhalt

Watching the frenzied media coverage of Anna Nicole's tragic death is not unlike attending a carnival sideshow and gaping in awe at the collection of freaks and whackos on display. Many bizarre characters have crawled out of obscurity to "comment" on Anna Nicole's untimely death, but what amazes me is how they use the occasion to talk about....themselves. I've created sideshow banners for some of the more entertaining characters featured in the Anna Nicole Smith Media Circus and will post a new one each day. Step right up and be amazed at the deranged old man who calls himself Prince Frederic von Anhalt. This "Prince" has been married to Zsa Zsa Gabor for 20 years and yet claims to have fathered Anna Nicole's baby. When reporters asked for details regarding his decade-long affair with Anna Nicole, he muttered something like "I cannot talk about zee affair because you see, I am a married man." Huh? Then why are you parading yourself out in front of the media?! A few days later, he then opens up a bit and says "Sometimes I'm a bad boy". Medium: Acrylic, prismacolor on paper.

Comments

[Viper Tetsu]

You've SO nailed this oblivious man-boy, down to the ridiculous costume and the vacant-yet-content look on his face. If ignorance is bliss, Von Anhalt is coasting on Cloud Nine, baby.

Moment I thought I'd never see: CNN specifically referencing the 50's sci-fi crap classic QUEEN OF OUTER SPACE (a career highlight for Mrs. Prince Von Anhalt, Zsa Zsa Gabor)in a 'news' story. Maybe the entire fucking press corps is on some LSD contact high.

[14]

oooo, Cap'n Stubing...I like!! Actually, I modeled the "Prince's" costume after that of Fredrich II Herzog von Anhalt:

http://www.deutsche-schutzgebiete.de/webpages/Friedrich_II_Herzog_von_Anhalt_.jpg

but I think Captain Stubing would have worked much better. Darn it!! : )

xoxo
14

[Demon Kitty]

Imagine trying to adopt a woman as your daughter so you can fuck her .... ew!!!!! The Anna Nicole media circus is nauseating, ain't it?

[pun_inpendid]

oops - meant that to read - I see Howard Stern as (not is) a performing seal ... in previous post. Just the visual that comes to mind for me in connecting him to the Circus theme. The white jacket makes Van Anhalt look a bit like Cap'n Stubing (sp?) on The Love Boat - also a hotbed of people getting busy and sometimes a little intrigue ; ) though no paternity suits.

[pun_inpendid]

The real question seems to be "Whose (not) your daddy?" Apparently her bodyguard is claiming repro responsibility as well. I too think 14 handled this Three no-Nuva-Ring in site Circus with equal measures of good grace and good humor. I see Howard Stern is a performing seal with a fake boob (instead of a beach ball) on his nose, clapping his flippers so that drugs will magically appear. They did say the drugs they found were in his name, and it does seem like he was always expected to clap his hands or wave a wand and make all the bad or distasteful crap go away in her life. Can't wait to see the rest of your sallies into the ANS Side Show, 14. Congrats on all the awesome things you are doing - both on the Gallery of the Absurd and through several other impressive venues! Take care, Jess

[Erik]

My money is on the dead billionaire husband doing the deed by turkey baster from the great beyond.

Any man married into the Zsa Zsa stable of husband and ex-husbands is, by definition, a freak.

[deanna]

oh sweet florence henderson!
the circus theme was just motherfudging brilliant!! i so totally love those cheesy gold plated medals of dishonor he hangs on the front of his ethiopian diplomat uniform of sorts. I especially adore that damn headdress with those frilly things that look like the same frilly things that hang off the bottom of my crazy aunt's drapes complimenting her plastic covered furniture. do you think he gets his eyebrows tweezed by the same maniac that hacks up sylvester stallone's?
no but seriously, according to www.borowitzreport.com , 1 out of every 6 men are now claiming to be the father of anna nicole's daughter. ain't that some mess?

[midevil]

Look, I fathered the baby. Yeah, I'm a woman, but you know modern medicine these days! It was great!

[libraesque]

Please be sure to include the revolting John Travolta/Revolta, saying how much he "loved" ANS and wished he could have helped her.............?????? I think that's $cientology speak for "we wish we could have gotten our meathooks into this ditz and scammed her out of all her money"

[Jenn F.]

Oh yeah. This guy's definitely a freak worthy of the circus. I read that he claims to have had this decade long affair with the gummy girl and that within that time, she asked him to "make her a princess like Zsa Zsa". He then suggested to Zsa Zsa that they adopt gummy girl, but Zsa Zsa refused. Now think about that... he's sleeping with her and then proposes that he become her legal father? Isn't that sick?

Besides, he's not even a real prince... he bought the title from a German princess who made her living by handling these type of transactions and calling them adoptions. She wants cash, people want the noble title, it's an easy trade. He retains absolutely no connection to the Anhalt dynasty.

The most pathetic was his excuse for his alleged affair... "Sometimes we men make mistakes." Oh piss off.

14, I admire the tasteful way you've chosen to poke fun at the people around A.N.S., as opposed to poking fun directly at her during what would be considered a sensitive time.

There's just one thing I keep wondering though... will the baby grow up to have crazy gums like her mother? I keep thinking of Jeff Polage's imitation of A.N. ~ one of the funniest things I've ever seen. For those that aren't familiar with this, check the "categories" section to the left.