Which is Real, Which is Fake? Part ONE

Can you guess which of these "food" items is a real product and which is the fake? Have you noticed how many products on grocery store shelves seem so cartoon-like and ludicrous? It's amazing how certain food companies transform truckloads of sugar, buckets of corn syrup, a dash of trans fat, a heaping tablespoon of processed sludge, and a generous sprinkling of chemicals into what they call a "snack". Good luck with solving the following 3 puzzles:

Pizza Hut has just added Butter Snackers to their menu and it's selling like hotcakes. The Butter Snacker consists of an entire stick of butter that has been dipped in batter, deep fried, rolled in sugar, drizzled with icing, and it's all topped off with candy sprinkles.

Ever since Domino's Pizza added the Oreo Dessert Pizza to its menu, sales have skyrocketed. An entire bag of Oreos are crumbled over a sweetened pizza crust and then the whole thing is drenched in vanilla icing. Get the door, it's the grim reaper.

Stumped? The answer is here.

Comments

[Linda]

Homer: Butter that bacon, boy!!

Bart: But Daaaaad, my heart hurts..."

(I've got the dry heaves just looking at the butter stick picture. *gag*)

[flicktokick]

Hey everyone, get across to Scotland for gourmet pizza cooking.
For years Scots have been able to indulge in a Pizza Supper (that's with Chips - or fries as you might call them) from their local fish and chip shop. Naturally for efficiency the pizza are cooked along with the chips in the fryer, as indeed is every other item on the menu - sausages, pies etc.
However as the oil has changed to more 'healthy' sunflower oil or peanut oil, the canny Chip Shop owners have found a new way to add that frisson of extra risk to the cardiac health of the diner; by battering the pizza first.
Yes, deep-fried battered pizza, naturally served with Chips and accompanied by Irn-bru, and followed with a deep-fried (battered of course) Mars Bar - that's a Milky Way in the USA.
So book your culinary experience in Scotland today - but wait to buy the return in case you heart doesn't last the pace.

[Steve]

Oh 14, you would pee your pants if you lived in Colorado. Our state fair offers such tasty health treats as:
Deep Fried Oreos (trans fats dipped in trans fats and deep fried in trans fats), Deep Fried Snickers, and Deep Fried Twinkies.
Of course, we also have hundreds of livestock packed together so tightly you can smell the waste before you enter the fairgrounds and all the carni-rides you remember from your childhood. Three delightful ways to make you hurl all in one place. A celbration of nausia that comes around once a year for all to enjoy.
I hate the state fair.

[moxie]

Oreo pizza...*makes me want to vom a little*

What's next, Skittles pizza? Gum pizza? Gummy bears on a pizza with icing and frosting and whipped cream?? *AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA* *my heart just stopped*

[cherise]

eeeeeeeeeeeewwww! the oreo pizza looks gross!! i mean, please, LOOK at the thing. Can it even whep up 0.0001% of an appetite? it looks like dung with whipped cream! YUCK! Whereas, i dunno, the way you illustrated "butter snackers", it actually looks good! lol

[ihaveadog]

Oh lordy lordy: YOU are brilliant!! Unfortunately I knew the answers to all (except for the repulsive French Fries, which hahahh, Brittney was spotted eating while leaving a public restroom!hahaha!). Do I watch too much TV? Thank you for the continual brilliance 14!!!

[Becca]

At least I saved the money!XD

[Demon Kitty]

On behalf of everyone in the fucking world- I wretch my guts up. The oreo pizza commercial is vile. I find it offensive. It looks like leprosy.

Nevertheless, I think Angelina and Nicole Richie could do with a deep friend stick of butter. I wish I had some red wine right now. I need a coronary bypass after looking at this.

[that_girl]

If I ate that butter shit for real, my body would probably go in cardiac arrest. That much butter in one sitting can't be good for you, so I'm glad that's fake.

[ing]

I tried it. The oreos were too soft and mushy. Wasn't great. We didn't finish it.

I was curious :[ I am a horrible vegan.

[just wonderin]

Oh! Forgive me for being remiss! I would like to send a big thank you to Viper for being so kind as to share the regional cuisine with us! Down our way we serve Mary "on the half shell"!

[rrright]

oreo piza is NASTY!

[14]

When I saw the Oreo Pizza commercial I thought it was an SNL skit.

Becca - order the Oreo Pizza! Then come back and tell us how it was.

I had one bite of a deep-fried snickers bar once. My heart almost stopped, but I'm glad I got to experience the gooey wrongness.

xoxo
14

[Becca]

I almost ordered Oreo pizza today.

Does that make me an idiot?9_9

[Viper Tetsu]

"Get the door, it's the grim reaper."

Holy Mother Mary basted in Simmering Juices, that throwaway line alone has me a'tittering...

[Noelegy]

My sweet, even-tempered husband has a surprisingly hostile reaction to those Domino's dessert pizza commercials. He says they make him just want to knock those people in the head.

Myself, I find the "Oreo mustaches" disturbing because they look like potting soil, what with the little white flecks.

Hey, you posted this just in time for the opening weekend of the Texas State Fair, home of such delicacies as deep-fried Twinkies, funnel cakes, and (new this year) deep-fried cookie dough and deep-fried burritoes.

My older brother battered and fried some Oreos one Thanksgiving after the turkey was fried. They were surprisingly good, provided you stopped at one.

[Heather]

I've seen the commercial for the oreo pizza too! I couldn't believe it- I felt like vomiting just thinking about it. I love chocolate and all, but that's a little ridiculous.

[Chansmom]

Oreo pizza.I saw the ad a few weeks ago and couldn't believe someone would come up with that, but hey, there are many out there that will buy it and actually like it. Blech!

As for fried butter, double blech! Extreme icing! I hate that crap! LOL!

[TheReallyJamesBond]

Ummmm,Um,... Ain't Bea never made nuthin'like dat in her Mayberry kitchen!

[midevil]

Good gawd, my heart stopped just looking at these pics! Could you please get it going again by posting a tofu veggie stir fry???

[Elizebeth]

I've heard Jay Leno making jokes about this for a week or so but I missed the commercial until now.

Wow.....I like your add better by the way!

[just wonderin]

"Extreme Icing"!!! You fucking rule 14!! It's times like this I'm almost glad to be a celiac who's allergic to EVERYTHING. I can run from shit like this! But...does it make me a bad person that I am eating soy "ice-cream"?

[Cici]

I love Oreos, but the thought of that pizza is making me sick! What twisted mind thought up that nightmare?

The first one reminds me of that epsiode of the Simpsons where they're watching a commerical for a block of choclate covered in honey, dipped in sugar and then smothered in "rich creamery butter".

PS: Is that Beth Ditto as the Land Lards mascot? Hahaha!

[RF]

Gotta' love people who will actually stand up for this garbage.

That's right - everything's awesome.

Every American who still has any grey matter left in their poor battered skull needs to see "Idiocracy" for a taste of the future. Or maybe it's here already.

[happy fat southerner]

A few weeks ago I watched in horror as Food TV Southern food celebucook Paula Deen deep fried butter much like this. That woman will deep fry anything (I also saw her deep fry an ice cream sandwich, no lie!)

We need more Paula Deen in the tabloid media!!!

[Jrez]

Come on, dessert pizzas have been around for decades. What's the big deal?

[Erica]

I saw the commercial, so I know the Oreo Pizza is the real deal.