The Enticing Odor of Celebrity

Introducing Celebrity Stench, the first all-purpose celebrity fragrance for the masses. Created by pouring every single bottle of celebrity fragrance ever created into a giant vat, Celebrity Stench is an amalgamation of all the celebrity traits you desire. Do you want the sexy sensuality of Jennifer Lopez, Usher, or Celine Dion? Do you yearn for the power and wealth of Donald Trump or Diddy? Do you wish to appear as attractive and alluring as Britney Spears and Paris Hilton? Now you can have it all and more with just one squirt of this amazing new fragrance breakthrough. Celebrity Stench is packaged in an economical 128 ounce plastic container and fitted with a convenient adjustable spray nozzle. Find Celebrity Stench at fine retail establishments such as Wal-Mart, Sam's Club and Costco, and if you act now, you'll receive two bottles for the price of one. That's 256 ounces of scented liquified celebrity for the low price of only $19.99! Medium: ink on paper, digital color.

UPDATE: We've just learned Celebrity Stench has been recalled back to China due to dangerous levels of lead. We are sorry for the inconvenience.

Comments

[Stop Sweat]

Hey,

Check out this blog, it goes with the "Celebrity Stench." It's called Celebrity Sweating, here's the link:

http://www.celebritysweating.com

[seabiscuit]

I dunno...seems a little pricey. I'll just whip up a batch myself using a little dysfunction, self-obsession and indifference and I will call it Orgasm because it will give everyone an olfactory orgasm.

[bonni]

Demon Kitty, I believe that one of the Paris Hilton perfumes (her first one, maybe?) has some sort of supposed pheremone substance in it. I don't know, as I never stocked it and have never even tested it, but I believe I read/heard that somewhere.

If there's a God, the pheremones are NOT from Paris, herself. ;)

[Viper Tetsu]

Christ Baked not Fried in Olestra, why are you NOT writing copy for Infomercials? Oh, yeah: Because you've got talent for something besides selling shit. And again, it's the little details (love the bi-lingual 'New' sticker) that make this piece so darn magical.

[YepYEPyep]

so 14 xmas is coming, no celebrity perfume for you?
And I had already bought you Britneys latest one : (

[Karen]

My husband got in the car the other day and he REEKED of something sweaty and dead (not his usual scent) I turned away instantly and asked "What the Hell have you sprayed yourself with?" If that's what Beckham smells like....Posh is welcome to him!

[coffeegod]

Now all you need is that really loud guy who usually shills for KaBoom to sell it on an infomercial.

[scungilli]

read SOMEwhere that the profit margin on these scents is huge. guess some celebs are cashing in ... go figyah ... used to be restaurants, dinit? ... nice work, 4teeny ...

[Demon Kitty]

Bonni,

After reading your comment, I am beginning to wonder if celebrities don't bottle some of their phermones and mix it with whatever. MMMmmmm, that could be a fucking good reason no one is buying Britney Spears. LOL.

[Demon Kitty]

Perhaps I could buy a bottle of this to clean up the cat pee, when my demons miss the litter box. However, that may make things a lot more vile.

Juju just bit me and shat on the floor because I wouldn't open can # 1,000,000 of cat food for her today. I can only imagine what a melange of eau de Sweat Diddy's Balls, eau de I Have been Eating Taco Hell and Kentucky Fried and Cheetos for months without bathing skin musk of Britney Spears, eau de covered with pan cake make up Jennifer Lopez, and eau de receptacle de Jizzum Paris Hilton would do to her.

I shudder to think.

[PeachPie]

I visit often, but never post. But damn it, I have to.

Never came across someone with such an exact sensibility, thoughts and point of view about the world of celebs as much as much as you. Twisted, sure, but exactly the same. It's like someone taking a thought outta your head and painting it.

Great wit, great talent, my friend. And as much as I hate the term "spot on" (you ruined that, Top Chef!), your commentaries and art are just that.

[Jenn F.]

Oh Deanna, you are like the Chuck E. Cheese of this comment section. You crack me up. Squirrel covers? *falls over laughing again*

[Arth Akal]

Too funny, 14... Too funny. This is a great way to start the day, thanks!

[bonni]

I sell perfumes (and other stuff), and I will say that there are a couple of celebrity perfumes that are actually pretty okay, as perfumes go, but overall, I tend to agree that the whole celebrity perfume thing is bizarre.

One thing is that when/if a celebrity falls out of favor with the public, the sales of their perfume will go way down, too! There will be a few holdouts who just like the fragrance and will keep buying it, but the shelf life of a 100ml bottle of perfume is pretty long, so by the time they're out, they may be totally over the celebrity (and the perfume).

I've got a couple of bottles of Britney Spears perfume that I'm going to have to literally give away because NOBODY is buying it....

[Chicki]

Kat, there's a key on your computer keyboard (you know, that thing with all the letters and numbers on it, where you hunt for the letters and then press them?) that says Caps Lock on it. Find that key. Press it. There you go, honey. And in future, please remember that IF YOUR TYPING LOOKS LIKE THIS you should press your Caps Lock key again.

[deanna1104]

thank heavens you got this out before the christmas rush. i think this celebrity stench, if in the wrong hands, might push those women who are already teetering on the edge of whoredom, right off the cliff. last thing i need in my life is joan rivers getting out a limo, legs spread eagle with no squirrel covers on, or barb walters walking round with her ass cheeks barely covered by some tshirt/dress outfit she managed into a dress with a pair of dirty cowboy boots. right now i dunno how i feel about this stench. a little here and a little there a few of us might manage to go out in a tank top minus the bra. BUT a full squirt, or 5 second stream? i dunno that i really want puff doo doo on my leg like that. i meant puff diddy.

[just wonderin]

Dear Kat,
May I ask who was complimenting your Celine Dion perfume? Was it Humans or Meerkats?
Sniffles

[Becca]

Brilliance.XD

[Jenn F.]

Kat, please stop yelling.

I love the spotlights behind the title. Nice touch. And the size of the jug is hilarious... it seems to suggest that users are likely to marinate in the stuff. Nice work, 14.

[14]

Dear Lovely Smellin' Kat,

It was "Celebrity Fragrance Week" on GOTA this week, but I forget to tell everyone. Next week begins the Halloween Extravaganza, so you may rest easy knowing I won't be messing with your precious bottle of Celine Dion.

xoxo

14

[Erik]

Brilliant and efficient, 14! Too bad about the high levels of lead though, maybe that's part of the reason so many celebs come off as braindead?

I think P. Diddy's next signature scent should be called "Wank" or "Wanker".

[just wonderin]

Too bad it's not available anymore-I love the carefully proportioned flacon!

[Alexandra]

LMAO!

Oh 14, I used to only really like your site. Now I adore it. You have an amazing way to taking trivial celebrity matters, and now you've mixed it with actual news.
You rock!

Can't wait for your next post!

-- Alleycat

[midevil]

Oh. My. Gawd. I can't wait until you cover the blow-up-doll story on Charlie Sheen, which can be found here:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21212671

[claire booth luce]

Also doubles as a fly and mosquito repellant.

[Jujupiter]

Very good satire. What about some brand extension like "Celebrity Stench For Men"? Or "Celebrity Stench Plus"?

[AMPed]

This captures the true essence of all the those 'wonderful' celebs you have featured the last few days - over blown and over sized...love it!! Especially love that you also said it was Nuevo....sweet...

[TheReallyJamesBond]

AHHHH,... Nothin' like the stench of overblown celebrity fragrence! Equal in aroma to the tantalizing smell of a massive stanky-foot-burger!!!

[KAT]

WHATEVER THIS IS ALL ABOUT, IT IS STOOPID!!!!
CELEBRITIES ARE, AS A WHOLE, WORTHLESS, BUT I REALLY DO LIKE THE CELINE DION FRAGRANCE "BELONG". IT IS A RATHER LOVELY SCENT AND I GET MANY COMPLIMENTS! MEERKAT MANOR FOREVER!!!!! FLOWER WILL BE MISSED!!!