Only Gallery of the Absurd has this exclusive photo of Tom Cruise's childhood visit with Santa. Smuggled to us by an anonymous source, this photo captures a happy little Tom sitting on jolly old Santa's lap during a childhood visit to the Xenu Gardens Intergalactic Super Mall located on planet Xordu back in 1972. Medium: digital composite. Much thanks to Cpt. Willy for allowing me to "touch up" his son's Santa photo
Thanks for uncovering Xenu's secret Santa! Tom probably have that Santa stashed at his mothership in Beverly Hills! Image the horror if that Santa is unleashed into the wild!? MIB! MIB! Where are Tommy Lee and Will when we needed them!?
Posted by: Texas | December 15, 2007 at 12:57 PM
I am so sorry, but I just have to get this thought off my chest:
I don't buy it. I just don't see how Tommy is enough for those tentacles to suck on--if you get my squirmy drift.
Posted by: midevil | December 14, 2007 at 10:28 AM
Giddyup!!! The look on Tom's face... AND THOSE SHOES!!!!!! Just toooooo funny!!
Viper, Demon Kitty and Javelin... i love your work, too!! Naughty, naughty, naughty...
Posted by: Mezza | December 14, 2007 at 06:29 AM
ahaha I love how Tom's facial expression and body language screams "bashful schoolgirl"... that hand resting on the knee is priceless.
Posted by: Javelin | December 14, 2007 at 12:40 AM
Viper, you are like a rainy day in fucking Texass!
How did you do this 14? This is brilliant! Wait a minute! What's that? What's that noise? OMG, that is the sound of Will Smith and Tom Cruise rolling out the plastic paper and greasing it down with Crisco, while a manservant in leather chaps and a dog collar phones up David Beckham!
Posted by: Demon Kitty | December 13, 2007 at 09:20 PM
LOVE the shiny vest and weird hair.
Posted by: WTF | December 13, 2007 at 05:14 PM
Does this mean there is no Cthulhu Claws?
Virginia
Posted by: Vernice | December 13, 2007 at 05:00 PM
Oh Viper!
I have the feeling we're not in Kansas anymore!
Dorothy, rubbing her eyes.
Posted by: Vernice | December 13, 2007 at 04:57 PM
OK so this won't earn me a whole lotta points, but I had shoes JUST LIKE THOSE @that time; but I didn't have his $$$ or his *** not to mention god forbid his ???
Posted by: Wayne | December 13, 2007 at 03:56 PM
I get the vibe that Cthulhu Claus has a third tentacle, and that it's, um, helping keep Laughing Boy's ass in place if you know what I mean and I think you do.
Posted by: Viper Tetsu | December 13, 2007 at 03:15 PM
FANTASTIC!
Posted by: Alexandra | December 13, 2007 at 02:38 PM
No Fair! He gets Becks and now Santy? How greedy can one little guy be?
Ummm, What exactly is holding up Santy's suspenders?
Posted by: Vernice | December 13, 2007 at 11:56 AM
Did I already tell you it looks great? Well it looks great. The little details like the platform shoes make all the difference, but I really love the tentacle arms.
Posted by: mockazine | December 13, 2007 at 11:51 AM
Brilliant. Can you print those off as post cards and sell them?
Posted by: midevil | December 13, 2007 at 11:25 AM
...so... Scientologists worship Cthulhu now?
God, it just gets weirder and weirder...
Posted by: deemacgee | December 13, 2007 at 11:20 AM
,.....And I want an up N' down Hollywood film career,.... and a wife that's an even bigger beard than your's,..... and a book I can understand,.... Oh yeah,... and a rich Black woman's couch to jump on in public like a damn fool!"
Posted by: TheReallyJamesBond | December 13, 2007 at 10:18 AM
I love the shoes! How great can you get? Too awesome. Hey can your source get John Travolta's too?
Posted by: AMPed | December 13, 2007 at 10:13 AM