For The Brangelooney on Your Christmas List: Touched By A BrANGELina Decorative Collector Plates

Confused about what to buy the obsessed Brangelooney on your Christmas list? Look no further, get them the Touched by a BrANGELina Decorative Collectible Plates and they'll be foaming at the mouth in an uncontrollable frenzy. Each handcrafted porcelain plate in this collection is shaped in a circle to reflect their beautiful family circle of love. Because the Jolie-Pitt clan is more than just a family, they truly are angels sent from heaven. Honor their blessed impact on our lives and choose your favorite offspring from a wide selection of children in Brad and Angelina's enchanting rainbow family, including Maddox, Pax, Zahara, Shiloh and the Holy Twins, Knox and Vivienne - with many, many more to come!

Display this Touched by a BrANGELina collector plate collection proudly in your home, or choose to throw them with delicious force at pictures of Jennifer "Maniston!" Don't miss this chance to celebrate the most blessed of families. Frighteningly strong, obsessive-like demand is expected for this beautiful plates, so order today.

Comments

[Collectible Plates]

If only it were a real product, and they broke up, the price would skyrocket!

[baby carriers backpacks]

Oh my goodness! I was randomly surfing the net, just googling stuff, and I came across this!

I really thought it was real for a minute, and was like... what the HECK?!

Then I saw the shed :)

And things started making sense... :)

Thanks for a great laugh! I needed that today.
-Sean

[Red]

I don't know whether these folks are to be commended, criticized or gawked at. You know there is talk of a little Burmese child being a contender for a coveted spot in the ever-expanding 'rainbow' that is the Jolie-Pitt clan. A part of me wants to tell Angelina that they aren't exotic animals or collectible purses. As for Brad, I think she has that boy on a leash. A dark, twisted, sexually perverted leash that he willingly wears...Just an opinion though.

[Elsa]

Priceless... I love love love your creative and sarcastic humour 14.. I have not laughed so hard in ages.Thanks!!

[14]

Hi Mockazine...

yep, I saw that. All I can say is, Oh great Spaghetti Monster, save me from the humorless people of the world.

xoxo
14

[Mockazine]

Hey 14, did you notice that you have a closet fan on limelight.com? I think she REALLY wants a collectors plate of her own, but she is afraid of getting mocked by her friends. I was going to comment on her blog entry, but I didn't want to give her that much validation.

Should I avoid posting her link so your loyal readership doesn't flame her at:
http://www.limelife.com/blog-entry/Angelina-Jolie-Collector-Plates-Jigga-Wha/1822.html

[Sweet Subversion]

No Viper, it wouldn't. I am soooo sick of these motherfuckers.

[Viper Tetsu]

As always, it's the details that make this dance, sing, and do the Hoochy-Koo. That pitch-perfect text with just the right pinch of straight-facedness...The ace, can't-tell-real-from-unreal, faux-Kinkade-spirational design...Mother Mary in ski-goggles and a mumu, it's frickin' fantastic.

Would it be cruel to note that Shiloh got The Big Lips from Mom, and The Dumb Look from Dad? Sorry, that just slipped out...

[Vern]

Thanks Sweet Subversion! I agree, these would sell by the buttload!

[Anne]

This is hilarious! Thanks so much for posting!!

[lt]

Oh, please, please, do a Jennifer MANiston, it would be priceless too. Great work 14!!

[FrechAffe]

I looked at this for 10 minutes before seeing the skull above Maddox. My favorite part. Yeah, it's like no matter how much you hear about throwing knives, and Angie's revenge-themed violent movies, and the adultery, and the vials of blood, people still just want to see... Angels.

I'm not sure what the psychology is or who the 'loonies really are. My guess is that they are women who were once in a cheerleader/quarterback relationship in high school and are now fat Protestants in some Joel Osteen megachurch, glamorizing their own fallacious "perfect American couple" ideal through Angie and Brad. But then why don't they like Jennifer Aniston, who is more the Barbie type instead of the Goth cutter type?

Let me rephrase. The Brangeloonies are women who were once in a cheerleader/quarterback relationship in high school, got married at 17 on the rebound, knocked out five kids, got fat, had a threeway with a couple of plumbers, got divorced, and have dirty consciences, but still glamorize the "perfect American couple" as long as there is selfishness and treachery involved, which Jesus ( in the form of Joel Osteen ) tells them is okay because we all make mistakes and are all chasing our own hearts. As long as we give to those unfortunate Africans.

[Sweet Subversion]

Vern, you crack my ass up!!!

This is fucking hilarious! If they were real people would fucking buy them. I wish this would be in every tabloid and every gossip rag so they could see!

[no2Brangelooney]

I have been having such a difficult time lately, but this made me laugh so hard.

[javelin]

you girls are genius... it's been too long. The images you chose work so well together, especially Brad's face. 14, you always have a way of coaxing real emotion out of things and people- So clever it doesn't doesn't leave a heavyhand print.

[Kamala]

Holy Shitsticks 14, this nails it right on the head. GENIOUS my dear. Scary thing is imagine how many people would try to order this if it were real. I applaud you...

[sparkl]

They really just make me want to go out and adopt all kinds of orphans and find my own personal male orphan carrier...I am just so not worthy.

[FrenchGirl]

You are so insanely witty! I absolutely LOVE this!! Great work as always!

[midevil]

You did a nice job, 14! I don't understand why people collect junk. Bleh.

[Donna]

Now this is something I would put in my curio cabinet. Along with my antique dolls and crystal figurines. Angelina is a Living Goddess, who does so much good for the less fortunate. I feel so blessed that this wonderful woman walks on the same green earth as I do. She truly is a gift from God.

That Aniston woman deserved Brad to leave her. She is so ugly with small round eyes and a chin you can use as a diving board. Ugly people like "Chin" can't keep a man. It is a sad yet true fact. She cries every night with the tears rolling down than masssive chin of hers while Angelina with her effortless beauty makes beautiful celestial angels with Brad Pitt and spreads her infinite Love around. Is there an 800 number I can call to order this lovely tribute?

[Leslie]

You really should have made the shed a little longer and completely pink.

[Bionic Squirrel]

The shed is genius. Now we get to look forward to the indignant defensive responses from plate collectors! Yay!

[sb]

I'm kind of looking for the hand painted village populated by just their kids in seasonal wear. But, you know maybe next year! ;)

[Oh Yeah]

Can you please create one featuring Aniston in her birthday suit like the one in GQ I really think the aniston fans would really, really love it. It would be like a COLLECTOR'S item coz you know the gal will be turning 40 in a few months that would be like a souvenir for her fans od what she look like when aniston turns 60..bwahahahhah!!!

[Sherry]

I think it's safe to say I'm a huge Brangelina fan, but even I can admire good humor and found this pretty damn funny.

[vern]

I've started a support group for people who have been "touched" by a Brangelooney. We hold the meetings in my Holy Sh*d. (say it 3 times fast!)
All are welcome!

[Peta]

The perfect holiday gift.

[Yay]

Oh my G! Sheer genius. You really did make my day, this is the first I've laughed all day. It's such a sad social commentary, and yet it does make me laugh.

Sadly there aren't many critical thinking people left, and certainly any with true intelligence that I've met can see through all the hype.

Again, I state: sheer genius. I tip my hat to you :-D

[leila]

Just brilliant, this is the best Brangelina post of many hilarious gems! I have actually printed the little engine that could pictures for my sister, her son loves the actual book, and she couldn't believe how accurate it was! I am the proud owner of a few plates from the Bradford Exchange-art for the stupid-as my ex used to say! These will be a fine addition to my collection of Norman Rockwell plates, sure to increase in value! I hope they'll arrive for Christmas!

[jen]

UGH!!!

[Knox Bronson]

So where can I order one?

I think you are on to something here. I think you could be the next Thomas Kinkade.

Did you see the limited edition Christmas At Graceland print? I am awestruck. But I know you could do better.

[deana]

They are just so holy, you just can't even look at it.

[Cynthia]

Goodness, only $49.99??? What a bargain! You could have charged LOTS more money than that, hahahahahahahahaha.

[Karen]

Oh my gosh, that is sooo hilarious! Thanks so much for making me smile tonight!