Gallery of the Absurd

Ted Kennedy Still a Major Player in Health Care Reform

Ted Kennedy may finally be at peace, but certain members of Congress and certain media outlets refuse to let him die when it comes to pushing Obamacare, err, I mean Kennedycare. It's not just the Democrats exploiting his death, Republicans are dragging him around to help their cause too.  

One is reminded of the 1989 hit comedy Weekend at Bernie's in which two vacationing executives discover their boss has died and must attempt to convince people he's still alive. Medium: digital illustration, idea for Weekend at Teddie's sent to me by Red.

Miley Cyrus Pole Dance Attracts A Brand New Demographic

Ever since Miley Cyrus performed her pole dancing act atop an ice cream cart at the 2009 Teen Choice Awards, a distinct change has been noticed in her audience demographics.  While the Hannah Montana star has been a big hit with the tween set, sources say more adult men are showing up at her appearances, and have even been observed pushing youngsters out of the way in order to get a coveted spot up front.  Madison, age 11, complained, "These weird men were standing all around and as soon as Miley came out on stage, they started hyperventilating and drooling."  Brittany, age 12, added, "Me and my friend Kylie could hardly see the stage because of all the yucky men up front. Ewwww! Some of them were giving her money and one like really old gross guy totally pinched my butt, I nearly barfed!" When asked how he felt about Miley's expanding appeal, father Billy Ray Cyrus replied, "Money, the kid brings in the money and we're already preparing Miley's younger sister Noah for the spotlight. Miley's been a sex symbol since she was very young. She's an old pro and I'm proud of her." Medium: graphite on paper, digital color.

Guest Artist: Madonna's Arms Alarm and Inspire

Nothing gives the editors over at Daily Mail more titillating pleasure than pointing out Madonna's imperfections. The very second an unflattering photo is released of her, they're on it like starved vultures. If it's not her veiny hands, it's her "bingo wings", her "gristle" (yikes), her "fearsome muscles", or her "haggard face". I suppose one could safely conclude Madonna is not well-liked by this particular newspaper. As an observer and documenter of gossip, I'm always interested in how people respond to these sorts of stories. A recent photo of Madonna's muscular arms caused a flurry of response and speculation across the internet, everything from a photographic retrospective of her biceps, expert opinions of her state of health, a handy anatomy guide, to the way her Kabbalah worship has left her Challah arms.  All very interesting, but my favorite response was created by artist Kipling West.  She was fascinated by the photo and created a beautiful illustration of Madonna's veins becoming roots, her hand of Fatima necklace transformed into Cthulhu, all "leading to destruction and carnage on a galactic scale". 

 

If Pablo Picasso Had Painted Paris Hilton

A reader sent me THIS photo of Paris Hilton tongue kissing yet another unfortunate victim caught in her talons under the darkness of night.  Upon first glance, it wasn't Paris Hilton I saw, it was the horse figure straight out of Picasso's Guernica.   Her exaggerated outstretched tongue and the way her hands hold the man in some sort of death grip seemed so calculated. She knew the paparazzi was snapping away at her and she knew the photo would make the rounds on the internet and that people would react to it. So yeah, I reacted to it. Medium: ink on paper, much thanks to Urban Rabbit and Krista. My sincere apologies to Picasso.